This one, sent to me by my co-worker, TK, made me chuckle. Then it made me want to go on a trip. And try some of the things listed. Maybe not the toe. Which shouldn't surprise anyone, since I'm the one who very happily - and willingly - ate the bacon and cheddar flavoured cricket. Yum, yum.
I've posted the email in it's entirety, although I may have removed names in the interest of privacy.
From:
Sent: June 12, 2009 10:31
To:;; Elizabeth House-Burnett; ''
Subject: FW: Mmmm Food
Sent: June 12, 2009 10:31
To:
Subject: FW: Mmmm Food
Hey Beth, maybe you could try whipping up a few of these recipes.
The World’s Grossest Food
By Robin Esrock
Robin Esrock looks at a Menu from Hell.
Reader Warning: Some of these descriptions may ruin your appetite.
Reader Warning: Some of these descriptions may ruin your appetite.
I compiled this definitive list with two very simple rules:
a) The items mentioned below should be available to members of the paying, mostly insane, public.
b) To qualify, the thought of each dish should make my stomach swill over, my throat seize up, my nose twitch in, and my eyes rattle out. On behalf of us all, my thanks to the Editor for not requesting a photo gallery.
a) The items mentioned below should be available to members of the paying, mostly insane, public.
b) To qualify, the thought of each dish should make my stomach swill over, my throat seize up, my nose twitch in, and my eyes rattle out. On behalf of us all, my thanks to the Editor for not requesting a photo gallery.
The Sour Toe Cocktail
Let’s begin in the Yukon Territory, in the long-past-its-boom town of Dawson City. The Downtown Hotel bar serves up a drink of straight whiskey, with added flavouring from a real life severed human toe. A big, gnarly one too, shrivelled and yellow, with the nail still on. I joined the Sour Toe Cocktail club, and to qualify, the toe must touch your lips. I can still feel it today, like a pickled, phantom limb. Everyone gets the same toe, and in the past, some toes have been swallowed. Feeling icky yet? Just wait…
Let’s begin in the Yukon Territory, in the long-past-its-boom town of Dawson City. The Downtown Hotel bar serves up a drink of straight whiskey, with added flavouring from a real life severed human toe. A big, gnarly one too, shrivelled and yellow, with the nail still on. I joined the Sour Toe Cocktail club, and to qualify, the toe must touch your lips. I can still feel it today, like a pickled, phantom limb. Everyone gets the same toe, and in the past, some toes have been swallowed. Feeling icky yet? Just wait…
Balut
Duck can be delicious, and eggs can be delicious, so why does it get nasty when you mix the two together? Balut, a popular delicacy in the Philippines, is a fertilized duck egg; that is an egg with a crunchy, sometimes feathery baby duck inside. You peel the shell, slurp up the embryonic fluid, add some salt, and bite hard into the crispy mushy goodness. Apparently, balut goes down really well with cold beer. Slugging back a few bottles might make this gourmet treat go down better, and for that matter, up again too.
Duck can be delicious, and eggs can be delicious, so why does it get nasty when you mix the two together? Balut, a popular delicacy in the Philippines, is a fertilized duck egg; that is an egg with a crunchy, sometimes feathery baby duck inside. You peel the shell, slurp up the embryonic fluid, add some salt, and bite hard into the crispy mushy goodness. Apparently, balut goes down really well with cold beer. Slugging back a few bottles might make this gourmet treat go down better, and for that matter, up again too.
Deep Fried Hairy Spiders
Personally, I just didn’t have the stomach for arachnoids when I was travelling by bus through Cambodia. A popular roadside snack, the large spiders are eaten in big bites, or pulled apart, leg by leg, and consumed like French fries. Black bug juice dribbles down the chin as you reach the best part of meal, the pincers and the bulbous back. All the poison is removed when the spiders are fried, and apparently the appeal lies in its crunchy-chewy texture. Along came a spider, and sat down beside her, and so Little Miss Muffet just ate the damn thing.
Personally, I just didn’t have the stomach for arachnoids when I was travelling by bus through Cambodia. A popular roadside snack, the large spiders are eaten in big bites, or pulled apart, leg by leg, and consumed like French fries. Black bug juice dribbles down the chin as you reach the best part of meal, the pincers and the bulbous back. All the poison is removed when the spiders are fried, and apparently the appeal lies in its crunchy-chewy texture. Along came a spider, and sat down beside her, and so Little Miss Muffet just ate the damn thing.
Ox Penis Soup
Let us just be grateful that, due to conservation laws and human evolution, it’s no longer Tiger Penis Soup. Some Chinese restaurants serve up this delicacy, known for its mythical and powerfully arousing properties. The broth is serviceable, but the reality of eating ox or deer penis is that it tastes like a hard, impossibly chewy sponge. Tourists wishing to partake in this dish may find themselves forced to spit it out, or swallow it whole.
Let us just be grateful that, due to conservation laws and human evolution, it’s no longer Tiger Penis Soup. Some Chinese restaurants serve up this delicacy, known for its mythical and powerfully arousing properties. The broth is serviceable, but the reality of eating ox or deer penis is that it tastes like a hard, impossibly chewy sponge. Tourists wishing to partake in this dish may find themselves forced to spit it out, or swallow it whole.
Fermented Shark (Hákarl)
Moving over to Iceland now, where they like their sharks rotten, stinky, and air-dried out for 5 months. Oozing the odour and taste of powerful ammonia (think urine-scented cleaning products), hákarl is an acquired taste, even in Iceland. Celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay puked on it, a common reaction for first-timers, who are advised to hold their nose to avoid detecting the disgusting stench they’re about to put in their mouths. Those who eat it are associated with being strong and brave. As someone appalled by the shark fin trade, I reckon anyone who eats the fins of these increasingly endangered fish should be forced to try this Scandinavian delicacy first.
Moving over to Iceland now, where they like their sharks rotten, stinky, and air-dried out for 5 months. Oozing the odour and taste of powerful ammonia (think urine-scented cleaning products), hákarl is an acquired taste, even in Iceland. Celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay puked on it, a common reaction for first-timers, who are advised to hold their nose to avoid detecting the disgusting stench they’re about to put in their mouths. Those who eat it are associated with being strong and brave. As someone appalled by the shark fin trade, I reckon anyone who eats the fins of these increasingly endangered fish should be forced to try this Scandinavian delicacy first.
Cats and Dogs
Widely condemned by the West and pet owners everywhere, it’s a sad fact that Fluffy and Fido are still on the menu in parts of Asia. Breeds of dog are raised specifically as food, and as my friend Naomi will testify, having adopted and therefore saved one such puppy from the roast, they remain viciously tempered. Dog has been eaten in China for thousands of years, and the meat is famed for medicinal properties. Meanwhile, Singapore’s Strait Times reports that up to 10,000 cats are eaten every day in the Chinese province of Guangdong. Brings a disturbing new meaning to the concept of “cat food”. Hug your Fluffy and Fido a little closer tonight.
Widely condemned by the West and pet owners everywhere, it’s a sad fact that Fluffy and Fido are still on the menu in parts of Asia. Breeds of dog are raised specifically as food, and as my friend Naomi will testify, having adopted and therefore saved one such puppy from the roast, they remain viciously tempered. Dog has been eaten in China for thousands of years, and the meat is famed for medicinal properties. Meanwhile, Singapore’s Strait Times reports that up to 10,000 cats are eaten every day in the Chinese province of Guangdong. Brings a disturbing new meaning to the concept of “cat food”. Hug your Fluffy and Fido a little closer tonight.
3 Squeak Dish
By now, I hope you’re warmed up for the really gross stuff. I am not making this one up, because I am just not that creatively sick. Served in some remote parts of China, the 3 Squeak Dish is a plate served with 3 pink, freshly born baby mice. The first squeak is when you pick them up with chopsticks. The second is when you dip them in soy sauce. You can guess what the third squeak is. Apparently they’re easy to chew because the bones have not hardened yet. Excuse me. I have to run to the bathroom now.
By now, I hope you’re warmed up for the really gross stuff. I am not making this one up, because I am just not that creatively sick. Served in some remote parts of China, the 3 Squeak Dish is a plate served with 3 pink, freshly born baby mice. The first squeak is when you pick them up with chopsticks. The second is when you dip them in soy sauce. You can guess what the third squeak is. Apparently they’re easy to chew because the bones have not hardened yet. Excuse me. I have to run to the bathroom now.
Escamoles
I’m back, and in the mood for a little insect caviar! In Mexico, escamoles refers to the larvae of the giant, particularly ferocious Liometopum ant. Its eggs are collected from agave plants, spiced, and served in tacos. Escamole has a cottage cheese texture, and a buttery finish. I’ve eaten ants and termites in various jungles, and they taste surprisingly like walnuts. Perfect for anyone into nuts, or just plain nuts too.
I’m back, and in the mood for a little insect caviar! In Mexico, escamoles refers to the larvae of the giant, particularly ferocious Liometopum ant. Its eggs are collected from agave plants, spiced, and served in tacos. Escamole has a cottage cheese texture, and a buttery finish. I’ve eaten ants and termites in various jungles, and they taste surprisingly like walnuts. Perfect for anyone into nuts, or just plain nuts too.
Casu Marzu
Those who have read this far -- and therefore possess iron guts -- will appreciate the hop over to Sardinia, Italy, where we can spread some thick sheep’s cheese onto a slice of toast. Only problem here is it’s been purposely allowed to rot and gather maggots, which adds to the soapy, writhing texture. Next time you have a cheese and wine soiree, think maggots!
Those who have read this far -- and therefore possess iron guts -- will appreciate the hop over to Sardinia, Italy, where we can spread some thick sheep’s cheese onto a slice of toast. Only problem here is it’s been purposely allowed to rot and gather maggots, which adds to the soapy, writhing texture. Next time you have a cheese and wine soiree, think maggots!
Lutifisk is a Norwegian fish weapon of mass culinary destruction. Laos Snake Whiskey is sold with farm-bred cobras at the bottom, some with scorpions for extra zing. On my menu from hell, there’s also fried cockroaches, haggis, and of course, our famed prairie oysters.
For dessert, let’s just recognize that we will eat whatever we are culturally conditioned to consume, and whatever creature with the distasteful misfortune to be around us if we are hungry.
For dinner tonight: Ox penis pizza. Ha! Really it was regular pizza. Boring enough with pepperoni, bacon and mushrooms per Mina's request. She has soccer tonight, so it was a quick dinner. She'd better score me a goal for making boring food.
For dinner tonight: Ox penis pizza. Ha! Really it was regular pizza. Boring enough with pepperoni, bacon and mushrooms per Mina's request. She has soccer tonight, so it was a quick dinner. She'd better score me a goal for making boring food.
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